Vigil Offering

I will never understand, however, I stand.

Here in this moment; one year from the day of the callous murder of George Floyd by the Mpls Police. He was a father, a brother, a human full of beauty and flaws. We gather to name him, hold him and bear witness to his loss. Together, we gather, to name others who have been lost. Lost to the same brutality. To hold them, together.

I ask you to pay attention to your body as we listen tonight, and search it for what is happening there. Name it. Is it rage? Is it the clamp-jawed silence of complicit shame? Fear, defense, remorse or pain? I have noticed all of these within myself in the last year. As I notice them, I name them.

Between the rage, and the silence. I notice the many other ways to show up. With humility, with courage, with vulnerability and love. I show up in joy for protest, song, poetry, and art. Expressions of life. Affirmations of our humanity. I show up to learn. I will name these. And never forget their names.
I’d like to share an excerpt from a chant and meditation named “HELD” which was written by Alexis Pauline Gumbs and put to music by Toshi Reagon. (link to the track “HELD” on bandcamp)

“It would satisfy a deep longing to be part of a practice of singing and communal
listening, held, named, held.

How does a course of grief and loss evolve to share crucial information?
…how are the [people] held, named?

And I think about you, and what you remember. What you keep close for as long as you can. I think about repetition and code, and when we priotize what communication and why. And how we ever learn our names in this mess. And the need that makes us generalize and identify.

If it was me, if it was you. I would say this in the way I could say it. In the too short time, in the high-pitched emergence. Remember this feeling. There is something called love. I would say, remember, there is something called freedom, even if you can’t see it. There is me, calling you in a world I don’t control. There is something called freedom, and you know how to call it, even here in the holding pattern. Even here, in the hold. Remember, remember, you are held, named.”

Black lives matter. George Floyd’s life mattered, it MORE than matters: it was precious and so is his daughter’s life, his brother and sister’s lives. And so is yours. I am here to bear witness and pay respect to George Floyd and his family because I believe that no one is free until we are all free.

I will never understand, however I stand.

Please sign on to support the Movement 4 Black Lives BREATH Act

Please sign this petition to the US Senate to pass the Justice For George Floyd Act

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